The Dover Depress can EXCLUSIVELY report that the town’s very own crime fighting pizza guys have HAD ENOUGH of the violence that outsiders have brought to our streets.
The far right and anti-fascist protesters from across the country have clashed twice in Dover in the last few months, effecting the lives of most Dover citizens. In a press conference BANANAMAN spoke on behalf of the group, Superhero Pizzaboys Outraged Over Fighting.
“People think that we only do this to sell pizza and to make money, but we honestly do not knead the dough! We are there every day, silently watching over our town and we can see how it’s affecting Dovorians. The police have tried their best to reduce the violence at these protests but there is mushroom for improvement. That way we feel SPOOF is feta off helping out.”
Bananaman, who’s real identity is unknown, continued to say:
“At the next protest expect us to be there with our promotional signs offers of justice, superheroes side by side protecting our citizens. Wherever there is a Dovorian in trouble, we’ll be there… in 30 minutes or less.”
All the signpost superheroes are determined to make a difference, however some members of the public are skeptical these pizza heroes will deliver.